Dating divorcees?
January 29th, 2008
I dated a divorced man (8yr divorcee) for 2yrs and never really felt that he saw me for whom I am truly as a person. I was reluctant to date this guy because he was previously married, but no less decided to give him the benefit of the doubt. I always thought that I was compared to his ex-wife and made it clear to him that I was not and if she wanted to continue this relationship does not mention his ex. Where we have done very well, but in reality I never thought our relationship was developing. I definitely put more effort in that I was to receive. He continued to live in the past and made negative concepts toward marriage and women. I was patient and compassionate with its past, but he wanted to go so our relationship could prosper. I was definitely ready to go to the next level, but was not feel well after 2 years (some problems rather painful), I decided to pull back. I am now ready to start dating again and not want to be divorced prejudices against men, but after this experience I do not know if I can
January 30th, 2008 at 7:58 pm
then dont got for divorced men, find a real man to treat you like you treat them. your better then that.
January 31st, 2008 at 6:24 am
Judge the man, not men! Your experience was with one man, a guy who was living in the past. YOU should have seen this long before you did, so blame yourself, not men. Do as you will, but keep your eyes open the next round.
And put down the chip on your shoulder…not all men are like this. Be open, be lovable, but don’t be naive. You will find what you are looking for when you least expect it, and a label, “divorced” will not be an issue. Good luck
January 31st, 2008 at 12:03 pm
Not all divorced guys are like that.If a guy says “well I was partly to blame im not perfect but Ive learned from my mistakes” then chances are he isnt going to be negative towards women and marriage.If all he does is talk about how he was such an angel and she was satan incarnate then he has problems especially if he is putting down marriage.Steer clear of guys like that.
February 1st, 2008 at 3:41 pm
you hit ther nail on the head
unless a person drops all baggage from the past
you should not be dating any more divorcee’s
there are plenty of single guys
why lower your standards?
February 3rd, 2008 at 8:38 pm
Whether a man is a divorcee is irrelevant. It is how he treats you. Are you the center of his attention? No? Move on.
Be cautious as you look for a new male relationship. See “How To Spot A Dangerous Man” here>>>
February 4th, 2008 at 1:03 pm
You certainly can run into the same problem with men who were never married. consider old girl friends, past live in partners etc… the list of possible baggage is endless. I wish you well and hope that you’ll be able to find a man who can value you for who you are and love you with all his heart. if you’re considering moving to Chicago, let me know.
February 6th, 2008 at 11:54 pm
can have a try of this site
I have found my match on it, it is totally free if you register a complete profile and upload your photo!
February 9th, 2008 at 8:12 am
We chatted on line.
February 11th, 2008 at 8:37 am
There is always going to be some type of baggage with a divorcee, especially when there are children involved. Personally, I have been a divorcee, but the second time I married it was to a man who had never been married just because of the baggage. If I were you, I would try to find someone who hasn’t been married, although that’s hard to find; but, again, I found one.
February 12th, 2008 at 11:18 am
not all divorced men are like this just go out with who you have things in common with .if he’s the right one past relationships won’t even come up
February 13th, 2008 at 8:05 am
You seem to be well read. Able to think through allot of things, whatever you decide to do, you will come out on top. Just keep them at arms length. It sucks to be hurt, but it sure is a pleasure to see a strong woman speak as well as you have. Have yourself some fun and you know the deal. If you see them speaking about their ex too much, playing the blame game and speaking against marriage, but want to romance you. Tell them to take a hike. 2 Thumbs up to you.
February 15th, 2008 at 9:18 pm
Get out of this relationship. It is two years already, he is stringing you along.
As far as divorced men are concerned in general. You have to think long and hard before you commit. They are divorced for a reason. If possible I would try and stick to men that were never married before. Even then that is a problem. Depending on their age, they might be the type of men that can’t commit. Truthfully it is half a dozen of one and six of the other.
All my best to you. Tread the waters carefully. It is better to be alone than be in a miserable marriagel.
February 16th, 2008 at 12:40 pm
I don’t think it has anything to do with divorced or not divorced. There are PLENTY of never- married, never-divorced men who have trouble being in a relationship, committing, etc. Focus on what a man has to offer you, and whether he is at the same readiness level for a relationship as you are. Don’t dismiss a good man just because he’s been divorced.
February 18th, 2008 at 9:17 am
don’t datee a divorced mann
February 18th, 2008 at 2:47 pm
Every person is different so you should not compare or have a mind set toward any person.
You seem very honest and want to give 100% to the right man. I think you should take it slow with the next person you meet, and see where he stands in comparison to what you are looking for.
You know what you are capable of and you need to know what he is capable of before you commit.
Good Luck.
February 21st, 2008 at 10:12 pm
Everyone has biases - oh, come on, you know you do. I have a bias against some scruffy dopey looking pot head who comes to my door telling me he’ll shovel snow out of my driveway for $20 but I can still hire him anyway - he’s the only guy offering to do it!
I might be surprised. He might do a good job.
So you have a bias against divorced men. Use that bias to find the guy who surprises you: the one who turns out not to be commitment-phobic. You can find one who loved being married, is a one-woman guy except that woman is gone so now he wants to be a one-woman guy for someone else. Not all divorces happen for the same reason!
The only bias you should have that is useful is the one that says two years is a long time to give someone the benefit of the doubt. That’s a useful bias to have.