My husband and I really are soul mates. We sincerely loved each other right from the minute we very first met at a high school dance. We both went home that specific night (little did we know) and shared with our parents that tonight we actually met the individual we were going to marry. Directly after we got wedded, we moved with my parents to be able to look for work and then start our new lives. It absolutely was exciting, but we didn’t have a place of our own to live immediately.

My father talked us into living with them for a while until eventually we were money wise sound enough to buy our own house. Little did we know, 1 month after moving into the new house along with them, my father would leave my very own mother, leaving us to look after my legally blind mom and my younger brother. We took over for paying for the bills and keeping things going in the appropriate direction, along with making use of my mother’s disability checks.

Actually, the house was still my mothers, mainly because it was in her name, and most of the possessions inside it were hers except for what we had in our bedroom. We lived by her rules of the house even now, just as I constantly did growing up as a child. Call when you are on the way home, tell me your plans, every time are you coming and going, share your financials….. Really still a child in a mother’s home.

We paid our share of the property payment, bills, food, etc and for a while it was working. We had our arguments and such, but nonetheless mainly everything went along smoothly. We were just frustrated we still had all of our possessions in our bedroom, were still living by my mother’s rules of the house, and still hadn’t moved forward with a life of our own.

At the 10 year marker it became obvious that we were actually slipping away from one another. My husband and I were having disagreements more, which lead to more fighting with my very own mother, and frequently the question came up whether I loved him a lot more than my family. In one particular argument, he told me that I will have to make a choice: my very own mother or him. Of course, later in conversation, my mom gave me the exact same ultimatum.

I searched my very own heart and did a save my marriage today review. Though I would always love my mom and always would like to be close to her, it was becoming more and more apparent that we cannot share a house living the way we did. I simply had to tell her that we cannot live together any more to save my marriage. At that point, my parents had been dating again for quite a little while and they had decided to get remarried, so it wasn’t like she didn’t have anywhere to go.

I basically told her that my husband is my future and the rest of my life. Although she will always be my mom and a part of my life, I needed to move ahead with my life along with my husband by my side. In order to do this, we required our own place, build our very own life, and make it happen on our own.

I still sincerely loved her and I didn’t want to mess up our relationship by consistently fighting. Understanding this was the first step towards years of happiness to come. We went our separate ways with our living arrangements, yet somehow we became closer as a family because we were living separately. My husband and I became closer than ever and discovered our initial love growing with our completely new life together. At the end of the day, we actually had to get rid of my very own mom to save my marriage today.